Paul Gadzikowski

DOCTOR WHO/Archy the Cockroach crossover

time and the cockroach

boss mehitabel the cat is back

as you know from my
reports she has been missing
since november but
last night she turned up

says she
for a good time call a
time traveler

so you ve been
visiting morlocks have you
says i

i haven t been back
to scotland
says she
though i could ve been

i tell you archy
i was minding my
own business
in the back alley
behind the fishmarket when
just as i needed a hiding place
out of nowhere appears a big
blue wooden box
to make a long story short
i d made the acquaintence of
the proprietor of a time machine who
after the purchase of a
friendly little claret
took me to atlantis

asks i

don t say it like
that there are three
says she
i saw them all before he
found the one he wanted i m not
sure he knows exactly how to
fly that thing

says she

when the blue box gets
to atlantis
the correct atlantis
and all the bull dung
is washed out of my fur
we get out and look
around oh archy the pillars
and arches all inlaid with
gold and silver and diamonds
and pearls there were portraits
of isis that must have been
painted from life archy you
can t imagine

and the clothing archy there
were fine silks and glossy fabric
they don t know how to make any
more solid stuff you can
really get your claws into

oh and the food archy

i knew we d get to that
says i

succulent pheasant and quail
imported from china and
trojan sweetbreads and pate
made from mermaid eggs archy
milk so smooth it must
have come from those holy
cows in india and oh archy
the sea serpent fillets were

was there entertainment
asks i

says she

were there poets reciting
their work
says i

i didn t notice
says she

only you
says i
could travel time back
to atlantis and overlook
the culture and politics
of the era for the sake of
a little sea serpent with
tartar sauce

well actually
says she
it was some sort of
state dinner
cleopatra was there

asks i
i thought
were cleopatra

sparks did fly
says she

i mean literally

the time traveler said
something about
photonic hyper differentials
and said he had to
immediately take me back
to the date i came from

so that s where i ve been
all tonight
says she

exclaims i
you ve been gone three months

damn him anyway
says she


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